Your Personal Development Plan
From Single to Soulmate...

Desperately longing for your soulmate?
Tried "Everything" or don't know where to start?
Maybe the answers have been closer than you realised all along?

Have you ever tried to find the salt, pepper or your keys, and they just weren't there? You seemed to look EVERYWHERE. You searched over and over again in the same places... getting more and more frustrated and dispondant as the seconds and minutes ticked by - only to eventually find what you were looking for "right under your nose"!

Sometimes we can be so consumed with "finding" something, that we:

  • don't see it when it's right in front of us,
  • don't actually know what we ARE looking for,
  • have unrealistic expectations, or
  • only look half-heartedly because we feel that it's a futile search.
  • If you were being honest with yourself, can you relate to any of these?

    Ultimately most of us want to be loved by another unconditionally, and give love fully and freely... To be best friends, lovers and grow old together with one amazingly special person.

    And while searching for that special someone is good... because if we don't look, we'll never find... there is a step before this that most of us bypass...

    Let me ask you: Are you really serious about finding "the one" for you? If the answer is "YES"... If you almost want to scream "I FEEL LIKE I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO TO FIND THAT SPECIAL PERSON FOR ME", then "welcome" because you've come to the right place.

    Simply put... The answers lie in YOU. You need to start by making a decision... a committment to yourself... that you are going to temporarily put aside your SEARCH for someone else, and instead FIND someone else - YOU!!! You need your own personal development plan, to provide you with a guide of things to work through and think about. That's exactly what this chapeter of The Relationship Coach website seeks to help with...

    Think about it:

    Let's say you have a precious antique clock that you are wanting to sell for the highest price possible. You wouldn't just wake up one day and say:
    "Right... I'm off to sell that old antique clock in the basement! Even though it has cobbwebs all over it, heaps of dints and I think the mechanism has stopped working that makes it tell the time... I'm sure it will still attract as much interest as it would if all those dints were treated and it were running well."

    No. Of course not! You'd have any scars or dints that could affect the overall integrity of the clock treated so they'd cause no further problems, you'd take the time to polish it up so it gleamed and you'd make sure it ran smoothly inside. Finally you'd find out where people went who had an interest in these types of antique clocks.

    So, whatever your situation right at this time, why not decide that you're going to stop looking outwardly and start focusing inward... on who YOU really are. Whether you have nothing or a worth millions, at the end of the day we all seek happiness. And it are qualities such as love, happiness, laughter, passion and fulfillment that all can enjoy.

    Determine NOW that you are going to dust off those cobbwebs... whether they're cobbwebbs of disillusionment, loneliness or trying to run away from the dints and marks on your own life that you'd rather not face... and walk with me. Let's work from the inside out, because it is then - with confidence, love for who you are and self-respect - that you will start to see the world slightly differently. Perhaps you will:

  • begin to see things that were always there,
  • KNOW what you are truly NEEDING,
  • have realistic expectations recognising that similar spirited people are drawn to each other, and/or
  • be filled with anticipation of the adventures that await.
  • This series of articles is written more like a workbook... a personal development plan to help you deal with the issues of the past, work on the priorities of today and plan the course that you want to take! Please stop and think about issues raised, grapple with questions and importantly, write down your answers (as there is something very powerful about the process of committing what you think to paper)!

    Also, recognise that no material is ultimately a total substitute for a good quality relationship counsellor. If any emotions or thoughts arise from articles on this site that you feel you need a greater level of assistance in exploring, please contact a quality relationship counsellor or counselling psychologist/therapist in your area. If you are in Australia, I consult in private practice in Newcastle, Australia as well as being available widely via telephone. Feel free to enquire regarding private consultation via the Contact LJ link... or even just to let me know how you're getting along!

    Please note: This page was written on 30th April, 2009. New "personal development plan" worksheets will be added regularly...




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